In this topsy-turvy world in which we find ourselves, locating a home worthy of hanging one's hat has been difficult at best. Some places are simply too far, others too expensive, and still other venues too seedy. When the pages of the menu stick together you know it could be trouble. There just aren’t enough places left to choose from, so we settled for University. University Sports Grille is a converted Burger Barn that has an L shaped bar hiding half the bar from view regardless of where you sit. It has a swamp cooler backed up by a 12 inch fan that hardly works so the place is always a bit too warm and now infested with flies appearing out of the blue two weeks ago. Dave one of three partners in this venture is around my age and looks like an old 'Hobbit' in that he can't be more than 5'6" wearing a beer gut just as big around. Lyle another old fart does allot of the cooking (actually pretty good food) but has as much personality as a paper bag! At times I've seen Dave place a mirror under Lyle's nose just to check. Trevor, the minor partner, is young (28) and a new father. His primary responsibility is to bring in the college kids from neighboring Denver University campus.
In a previous post I promised to extend a hand of fellowship to the trivia playing patrons at University for a solution to our differing playing styles. The answer came in a natural peaceful process of preferences. All I did was turn up the volume to the beloved 'Blues' channel and discovered we can't hear them nor can they hear us...PERFECT! The fact this was handled without bloodshed leads me to believe our takeover will be of peace and mutual respect. Already the leader board indicates our influence as the curmudgeons have 8 places of ten possible. The other players have already accepted the new paradigm and do the best they can. Good has defeated Evil!
Settling in a new place is always uncomfortable. A new Job, relationship, or even a bar all require time to feel accepted and welcomed. The Bagwan was gracious enough to introduce me to his favorite place to imbibe. The pretty bar-tender will laugh at your jokes, tease you, and offer admonition when over the line. I was warned prior to entering not to say anything that would embarrass our Bagwan and put him in disfavor with the bartender as well as management. Evidently there's a pecking order in terms 'favorites' and Bagwan sees himself as a serious contender for being atop this list. After several glasses of wine I began to feel comfortable and at ease, so during a picture sharing discussion, I made a remark about the bartender's son looking like a 'sissy' and you'd have thought I had just pissed on the piano! You could hear a collective gasp from those at the bar all looking at me in disbelief. Evidently the bartender's son has been seriously ill for most of his life and only lately beginning to recover. Two people sitting to my right got up and found seating away from me and my apologies were falling on deaf ears. Still groveling asking forgiveness I got up and left wondering how it all got away from me.
I have tried for the last couple of days to contact the Bagwan to see if I damaged his 'favorite' status at the bar, but refuses to return my calls. On that basis alone I suspect he has fallen from grace and has been besmeared by my unfortunate remarks. Baggy if you’re still reading this 'horse’s ass' I simply didn't know! Having said this though, I'm confident you'll find your way back to your proper place atop the 'favorites' list.
REJECTION COMES EARLY ON....zuki takes one for the team
Good Morning Gormandizers,
It’s Funny how we handle rejection. Some get angry; some are humiliated, while others blame it on something far removed from the discussion. However one handles it rejection continues to be one of my biggest fears. I often times ask myself, "what's the worst that could happen?" So I either experience the worst case scenario, or I'm pleasantly surprised, but nothing happens unless one is willing to take a risk. A prime example of this happened just a few days ago while visiting with one of our own at 'Blondes Fire Drill' or something like that. The discussion (absent of trivia) primarily consisted of politics, financial reform, and the bloodthirsty Filipino high jacking a bus. There was even a brief discussion of Fall fashions, but got interrupted when Lauren walked over to us. Lauren is a tall beautiful bartender who I lust after continuously, but she considers me harmless which of course infuriates me. She went out of her way to explain to us that her mother was coming in and to be on our best behavior. We in turn lied and said we would.
Lauren's mother appeared some fifteen minutes later taking a seat at the opposite end of the bar. She was also tall and it was evident to me she kept herself in good shape, but couldn't make out her facial features. Facing straight forward I was looking into a 8' X 8' window that tended to silhouette Lauren's mom by the afternoon sun, so it was clear I would need to approach her for the final check-over. After 15 minutes of sizing her up, I thought I'd grease the wheels a bit and buy her a drink to break the ice. Lauren delivered the drink but instead of getting credit for it, she indicated it was from both of us! This of course brought my associate into the mix which by any standard would kill most deals involving a woman. But before I could clarify the situation, Lauren's mom pushed away from the bar and walked straight out the door! All it took was one glance at my good friend and she hit the floor on a dead run!
Stupefied I looked over at Lauren seeking an explanation. In complete seriousness she explained to us that mom needed to check on her dogs and would return. "Shit Lauren she was only there 20 minutes, you'd have thought she'd take care of her dogs prior to stopping by" I whined. "She has no intention of coming back does she?" I continued, but Lauren stuck to her story. The dough-head sitting next to me thought the drama was funny and indicated to me how much he enjoyed being a 'fly in the ointment.' I insisted he was more of a 'turd in the punchbowl.' This kept him quiet as he pondered its meaning.
While I can't say for certainty I was rejected outright given the double-headed gargoyle mother had to choose from. I highly suspect had this been handled with a little more thought perhaps I could have won the day. We’ll never know.
MISERY LOVES COMPANY!.....zuki enjoys a "good walk spoiled"
Good Morning Scratch Golfers,
The Golf Gods were angry yesterday. They were in no mood for tomfoolery and repressed every attempt to take the field by force. Our strategy was simple. Make at least one safe shot allowing the others to get aggressive even though the risk-reward ratio wouldn't normally warrant a risk be taken. Shortening the approach shot to a nine iron or wedge was our collective goal. While this plan looked good on a cocktail napkin, our execution was seriously flawed. Only Dan the Bartender could find the fairway, as the rest of us were wandering in the trees looking for a miracle! This forced us to use the safe shot much of the time. For the most part I left us a shot in play, but averaged 180 yards to the green; not a high percentage shot. Fortunately once on the green, my putting kept us in the hunt as I managed to save par and sink two birdy putts of 15 - 20 feet leaving us 4 under at the turn.
We came to the 135 yard 11th hole a par three. It was this year’s designated "Hole in One" prize hole, a "Crystal Red" Corvette or $50K so you can imagine the excitement. I told everyone I wanted the car, but really would have opted for the cash. By the time the IRS got done with me, I might have enough to fill my gas tank and call it a day. Given the wind was directly into our faces I finally struck a clean 7-iron. It looked good for a second just before it drifted over the lake…( for the round I lost 14 golf balls) jeez.
As you may remember Saturday afternoon was in the mid-nineties and as a team we tried to keep hydrated so we didn't wilt down the stretch like last year resulting in a dismal third. But the Vodka-Tonics, Beer, and accoutrements suitable for the occasion had taken its toll. It was very important for me to get my shit together as we had yet to use my third and final drive (each team member is required to use at least three of their drives). I girded up my loins, took a long drink of water, and bore down on #18 thinking of nothing but delivering my acceptance speech.
In the last three tourneys the winning score has been nine under par. We were at 5 under but playing a very difficult course with constant wind, so we believed we were in it. All I had to do is make contact and get it out there 200 yards. We were in agreement we needed a birdie to have any chance. The 18th is a 398 yard par 4 with a lake running along the right side. Nobody else walked to the tee; we had to take whatever shot I could muster. As I was predicting all day, I choked and swung completely out of my shoes, not only throwing my back out, but shanked the ball straight right and into the water! In my defense though, I begged and pleaded not to leave me at 18 needing my drive. With a disgraceful double bogy only now did they understand. That said, we did finish in the money tied for third but I’m growing weary of third place!
Fear not, for I am with you;
Be not dismayed, for I am your God
I will strengthen you,
Yes, I will help you,
I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10
zuki
31/08/2010 07:23
HAPPY B DAY LULA!! MORE SPOILED MILK FOR YOU!!!
ZUKI
23/08/2010 07:24
HAPPY B DAY KIMSTER!! NEVER EVER LOSE THE TOOL BELT!! LOVE YA
zuki
13/08/2010 13:45
Thanks AZZ, in some small way you were part of it...sort of....but thanks
Good Morning Somnolent Ones,
Good Morning Gormandizers,
Good Morning Scratch Golfers,